With rising cases of marital disagreements, divorces and domestic violence in the society, one may want to conclude that the marriage institution is in complete shambles. The unmarried are now wary of the institution, and may even prefer to remain single, since no good news seems to be coming out of it.
However, successful marriages do exist; but they are not usually heard of because bad news circulates faster than good news, and attracts more readership in the media.
How then can one have a successful and happy marriage?
“Whether or not a young couple stay together often depends on why they got married in the first place”, says Charly Boy, who recently started a marriage counselling practice. “Take it from me, it is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages”, he added.
He went on to explain that for a marriage to be successful, a lot of hard work, commitment, and a level of maturity is required from both parties.
Being married to the same person for almost 38 years has thought me that marriage is no moimoi, neither is it beans and rice. Both parties must work at it daily and must give all of himself /herself everyday, forever. For me and my wife we are committed to managing each other because the devil we know is better than the Angel to come. Marriage like I keep saying is how we maturely deal with our incompatibility rather than our compatibility.
What Charly Boy said about incompatibility can easily be taken out of context by the undiscerning. It’s important to point out that one shouldn’t marry a person they are not compatible with, hoping to “maturely deal” in marriage. That would be a recipe for disaster!
A successful Marriage has to be between people with a high percentage of compatibility, the remaining percent is what will be maturely dealt with in marriage. Of course, 100% compatibility is not achievable, due to differences in personalities, temperaments, upbringing and family backgrounds that define who people are.
Source: CharlyBoy/Facebook
