Parenting can be tough, and sometimes we struggle with the best way to teach our children important life lessons. A Nigerian mom Vivienne Undie-Ogon, recently found herself in a situation where she had to teach her son the importance of education and hard work.
As a mom who has learnt that spanking/beating kids was counterproductive, she came up with a practical parenting style which proved to be much more effective than spanking, and has inspired thousands of Nigerian parents.
In a Facebook post,Vivienne narrates how her second son decided to drop out of school because he hated it, and what she did to make him have a rethink.
Read her interesting post below:
“I have been having issues with my second son this term. I guess the holiday was too long. Complaints of lack of seriousness in class amidst others. So even if we can spank/beat our children in this part of the world. With time even that fails. Finally, he walked up to me. Told me he hated school and wanted to leave. Hmmmm, on top of all that school fee we have paid, that was neither smiling nor joking. I could see he was ready for war. He stilled himself, to see if I wanted to hit him.
“I counted from one to ten and put on my thinking cap. I smiled and told him, ‘Son, it is okay to drop out of school.’ He looked at me wide eyed like I had horns or something. I went on to outline all the schools, his Father and I had been to. How even up till now, we were still in school. I said, why did we even bother. Maybe because we wanted to have the jobs we have now. He nodded sympathetically and went to sit on the dining, grabbing a packet of his favourite cereal.
“Then I finished off my boring story with the universe and how sometimes it was unfair. Unfair because the universe will not allow you enjoy the proceeds from something you hated badly. He looked at me, somewhat confused. So I asked him to drop the cereal, the cereal was one of the proceeds of my education. So since he was dropping out, he couldn’t have cereal, which was made available because I went to school. I gave him a piece of yam on a nylon bag because he couldn’t have plates either. They were the proceeds of the school his Father and I had attended.
“Next, I asked him to vacate the dining. Yes nah, dining we bought because we went to school? How can you sit on it. By now, despite the cool environment, the young man was sweating. But he also didn’t want to lose the battle. Next it was TV time, bear in mind that in my house, we have TV days. So if you miss some certain programs, you may not get to watch them until the next week. So he sat down on his favourite sofa, ready to watch TV. I asked him to leave, TV was also the proceeds from the hated institution called school. He looked shocked, like he was about to have a stroke but walked to his room.
“Was I done? Mbanu, how can I be done when I have not won this battle. In his room, I said he can’t sleep on his bed nor touch toys or even his clothes. Then I made the call, to a phantom Great-uncle living in a hut, without electricity,hot water,TV,AC, cereal,clothes or even food. I told him he was about to have a partner. Someone to follow him inside the forest and hunt wild animals for survival. Someone to help him kill all those snakes he encountered everyday. Someone to sleep on that thread bare mat with him on the floor. By now, the guy was weeping profusely.
“Was I done? Ne-hi. I put some dry rags in a nylon bag and gave him. It was time to leave my house. After all, he can’t live in a house which is a proceed from the education of his Dad and I. The boy was begging now, saying he never knew it was education that brought all what we had. I said, ‘No problem, I am not angry, just move so that you will go and live with that your Great-uncle that did not go to school.’
The boy started begging, promising to stay in school, to write well and do his work on time because he couldn’t imagine his life in future without all these comforts cum basic necessities.
“Yesterday,his teacher called me to ask what I had done to Anthony, that made him become a star pupil all of a sudden. I smiled and said, ‘Finally, Anthony understands why he is in school.’
Sometimes, it is necessary to spell these things out for our kids, let them understand that education and hard work are necessary in life. Maybe when we do, they won’t see politics as a money making venture in future not corruption as an easy way out.”
The post has been shared many times across Facebook. A lot of parents applauded Vivienne for her practical disciplinary action which they described as smart and inspiring.
Will you be adopting this style of parenting?
